Your final destination is a result of a series of choices. The many bumps and curves that are encountered throughout serve as a learning experience. Growth is overcoming our failures. Sometimes we put so much emphasis on where we’re going that we don’t enjoy the ride. I have struggled a lot in trying to see the upside to certain situations. It’s a mental exercise that, with time, you just get better at. I understand that not every ride is going to be enjoyable; if it was supposed to be, how would we grow?
I feel that a lot of people look at my life from the outside looking in and think that my life is perfect. I don’t believe in a perfect life. Most of us have encounter struggles that can’t be easily fixed; the ones that we are born into. I believe that life itself has perfect moments that will take your breath away. And that those are the moments that we need to inhale and let soak in. These are the moments that will give us the strength to keep going and keep pushing forward when we think we can’t keep going. We are all humans, so we all have given up at some point in our lives. There are some circumstances that take the best out of us and we feel stranded and beaten. We are entitled to get tired and consumed with life. At times we can even question life, God and our luck. But as simple it may sound we must have faith. You can cry about it for as long as you need to; give yourself time to digest the change, but you must stand up and keep fighting.
When I broke my ankle, I couldn’t believe God would give me this cross to bear as if I didn’t have it hard enough my whole life. I honestly feel that I was in denial about the severity of the situation. One of the reasons I think It was hard for me to accept the reality that I was living is because I honestly couldn’t imagine God thinking I had the strength to go through this process. I have never have had a health issue and I proudly always stated that when I went to any doctor visit. This was shocking and difficult to comprehend. I have cried, I have been depressed for days and I’m probably still am going to be having many difficult days. But, I understand that it hasn’t taken me anywhere. I now know I have to find the strength to keep pushing myself through the pain. My whole life has changed whether I want to resist it or not. I think the hardest part has been to accept that I will no longer be the same Marcel I once was. But I want to be, at least physically. Therefore, I’m going to keep pushing until I can’t anymore. I’m going to keep allowing myself to have these crazy moments where I let all my build in frustration and just overall feelings towards the change my life has encounter to come out, but I will no longer feel bad for myself. I just can’t give up. I have to be stronger. I have to get better, I have to give this thing a fight for it. I have to win.
Going on vacation to Tulum, Mexico on a girls trip after 3 surgeries one year later after breaking my leg was so depressing. To see the difference between me and them was something I didn’t want to see and hard to accept. To see myself not being able to go and enjoy my day like the rest of my friends killed me. To see them just walk out of bed and enjoy life; go on long walks, dance, jump, without feeling any pain was all I wanted to do and couldn’t; and that hurts.
I did push myself to beyond the pain. We all wanted to be the typical tourists and enjoy the many beauties of Tulum. While there, we visited the Maya Ruins of Tulum, Casa Malca also known as La casa de Pablo Escobar. We ate in the most amazing restaurants. I personally did not enjoyed their food, but the restaurants were extremely unique and an experience of their own. My favorite thing about the whole stayed in Tulum was that you can visit any hotel without having to stay in it. This factor creates a more relax experience. In other words, you can make breakfast reservations for #Azulik without having to stay in it. However, I would! I am dying to visit Tulum again but this time around with Zack. I promised myself I wouldn’t stay anywhere else.
The trip to Tulum made me reanalyzed all the things I was taken for granted. I was definitely taken back by so many things. I also believe getting my IG hacked while there helped. Today I am able to enjoy the small things; small walks and being alive. Sometimes we take the most important things in life for granted. Today, I’m not. Once you truly understand that every day alive and healthy is a blessing your whole perspective of life changes.
It’s not about the final destination, instead, it’s about the journey to get there.
Everything that happens to us has a purpose, look for it!